I'm a relationship expert and this is the age to get married, buy a house, have a baby to be financially secure at 45

KNOWING if you’ve found ‘the one' or a life partner can be a difficult question to answer. 

Many people search for the perfect person to settle down with, get married, buy a house and have a baby with. 

But doing all of those monumental things doesn’t come easily or cheaply. 

If you want to be financially secure at 45, then some say there are certain ages people should aim for to reach the milestones. 

Alex Mellor-Brook, the co-founder at Select Personal Introductions has been a relationship expert for over 20 years and loves helping couples remember what they already have in their relationships. 

He identifies misunderstandings and provides couples with the tools and mechanisms to help fix any communication breakdowns as well as help them grow stronger as a couple. 

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The certified matchmaker and science-based dating coach said some believe there are ideal ages to get married, buy a house and have a baby if you want to be financially secure by 45.

He said: “Marriage in your mid 20’s to early 30 allows you time to focus on your career, buy a house and put savings in place for your future. 

“According to the ONS, on average it costs £21 a week more to live as a singleton.

Again mid 20’s early 30’s is a great age to buy a house. Most mortgages last 25 years and so would mean you would only have between 5-15 years left on your mortgage by the age of 45.”

Relationship expert Alex also explained that some people can be really savvy financially – which will help their future. 

He advised that if you were paying 10% extra to your mortgage (most mortgages allow this before penalising you), you could shave up to 6 years off your mortgage term.

This would give a couple more financial freedoms to explore the world together.

Alex went on to discuss the ideal age to have a baby if you want to be financially secure at 45. 

He said: “Children are one of the biggest expenses you will have in your life. 

“Again mid 20’s to the early ’30s is ideal as it might be easier to conceive. As we get older it becomes harder for both women and men to have children. 

“After 35, a woman has less than 75% chance of conceiving, which then drops to 50% by the age of 41 years.”

Alex went on to explain that for men, fertility halves after the age of 35 years and continues falling as they get older. 

Again mid 20’s early 30’s is a great age to buy a house. Most mortgages last 25 years and so would mean you would only have between 5-15 years left on your mortgage by the age of 45.”

If you require IVF to conceive, the relationship expert explained that each treatment can cost between £1500 and £5000 for each cycle.

Plus there’s less than a 20% success rate for couples in their late 30’s and older. 

So leaving children until later in life could impact your financial security. 

Alex said: “These ages could be seen as ideal as you are building your life together, sharing both experiences and financial costs as a couple. 

“You perceive lifeless as an independent person and more as a team due to your life’s experience so far.

“But these ages don’t suit everybody. Establishing yourself in a career takes time, dedication and commitment.

“If your focus has been work-driven and less about your personal life, your chances of meeting a compatible partner to share these financial commitments with will be reduced considerably. 

“You may not be ready to commit to a serious relationship in your mid 20’s, early 30’s and feel more comfortable settling down a little late on in life.”

But these ages don’t suit everybody. Establishing yourself in a career takes time, dedication and commitment."

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