I'm cheating on my boyfriend with a man who wants oral sex in dark country lanes

DEAR DEIDRE: I’M cheating on my kind boyfriend with a man who is only interested in oral sex down dark country lanes.

I really don’t know how I got into this situation and I certainly don’t know how to get out.

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I’m 34 and my boyfriend is 35. We’ve been together for eight years and have five-year-old twin boys together. This other man is 42.

Messaging this man on Snapchat has added fun to my otherwise dull life.

After setting up a fake profile three months ago, I used my own photos, but a different name and life.

I told him I’m a senior nurse in an A&E department when in reality I’m a part-time receptionist.

Initially, when this man took an interest in me, I was nervous.

We’d been swapping photos and chatting regularly. He was so complimentary about my looks, I started to get excited about meeting him.

We finally met last week and he was much better in the flesh than his photos.

We went to a quiet country pub for a drink, then he took me for a drive in his flash BMW. He parked in a lane and we ended up kissing.

Things became very heated and I performed oral sex on him.

I’ve never done anything like that with my boyfriend. What has come over me?

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This man keeps saying he doesn’t want anything serious. To him it is just a bit of fun.

We’ve met three times so far and our encounters always follow the same pattern.

Now I feel stuck and don’t know what to do. I do love my boyfriend. He’d be heartbroken if he found out.

DEIDRE SAYS: Fooling around with another guy may be an ego boost but in reality this is only a distraction.

The affair creates excitement away from the responsibilities of work, being a partner and a mother. But you know it is not worth the guilt and you have so much to lose should your lovely boyfriend discover the truth.

At least this guy is being honest with you – and has been from the start. Hear what he is telling you. He offers nothing more than an affair and never will.

I am sure he is charming as well as attractive but this man will never commit to you. End it with courage and determination, then focus on your relationship.

Do you and your boyfriend really make time for one another? Do you make an effort with your sex life?

It is easy to lose that connection with young children to care for. My support pack Torn Between Two Men will help you think this through.

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