Riverdale's Ridiculous Trailer for 7-Year Time Jump — Archie Goes to War, Betty Battles Serial Killer
The CW series is looking to go even more bonkers with literal war on a football field, Betty in the pit a la “Silence of the Lambs” and that’s just two characters!
And we thought “Riverdale” got pretty crazy in its first 79 episodes. It looks like we haven’t seen anything yet, as the trailer for the long-awaited seven-year time jump is finally upon us … and it looks absolutely bonkers!
With just a few random glimpses that look like some kind of fever dream by way of heavy hallucinogens we get hints of every dramatic war film we’ve ever seen, one very famous serial killer profiling drama, every tortured writer saga and … Veronica gets married.
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It looks like in the time since graduation, Archie found himself sent off to war — uh, on a football field? — and then sent home after suffering an apparent injury. Maybe he ran into that goal post on the field and suffered a traumatic head injury.
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Maybe we did watching this trailer.
Or maybe the whole war was as much a fever dream as this 30-second clip that somehow felt like it was seven years long!
Jughead, who narrates the whole thing of course, revealed that he’s a published writer before offering a glimpse of himself getting outraged over a word processor because no one told him about computers (we’re guessing here).
As for Betty, she apparently decided to live out the script for “Silence of the Lambs” scene for scene, complete with jogging through the forest in FBI sweats and spending some time down in a serial killer’s pit. Yes, they took the homage that far.
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In fact, between the football field battlefield, the everything going on with Betty and Veronica’s beau being a white dude named Chadwick, we’re half wondering if maybe all of this is some dramatic story that Jughead created for his book.
Maybe he’s screaming and pulling his hair out because he realizes just how ridiculous it all is. Maybe all of this series’ craziness has been Jughead’s fiction. Maybe he hit his head on a goal post in the middle of a battlefield.
“Wow, lots of catching up to do,” says a uniformed Archie in the clip. Yeah, we’ll say!
With “Riverdale” already renewed for another season, we’ll have plenty of time to delve into this bizarre new future world we’re about to find ourselves in.
“Archie” takes its bold leap into a bonkers future next Wednesday at 8 p.m. ET on The CW.
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