Isabel Oakeshott betrayed Hancock and offers writing skills to Andrew

EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Isabel Oakeshott betrayed Matt Hancock and now offers her writing skills to Prince Andrew

After betraying former friend Matt Hancock by leaking his private Covid WhatsApps, Isabel Oakeshott now offers her skills to a disgraced royal said to be contemplating his own memoir. 

‘Dear Prince Andrew,’ she cheekily announces. 

‘I’ll happily ghostwrite your book. If you have no dark secrets, an NDA [non-disclosure agreement] won’t be required.’ 

Matt Hancock and Isabel Oakeshott at the launch of his book, Pandemic Diaries: The Inside Story Of Britain’s Battle Against Covid in December 2022

Should Andrew be unwise enough to accept could the kiss-and-tell emulate Harry and be called Snare or Scare?

Rumours persist that Charles wants to cut Andrew’s allowance, forcing him to downsize from 30-room Royal Lodge to ten-room Frogmore Cottage. 

But he is likely to be out of pocket as the only way Andrew, who has a 75-year rent-free lease on Royal Lodge, would move to Frogmore with an estimated rent of £360,000 a year, is if the King makes it financially viable. 

Maybe Andrew could ask his [email protected] charity for a spot of crowdfunding cash?

Seven weeks to Coronation Day and Buckingham Palace is yet to provide definitive sartorial guidelines on what to wear. 

Do family tiaras need to be retrieved from bank vaults along with other jewels? 

Will uniforms and medals be the order of the day? Will peers need to scramble for robes? 

In 1953, lords and ladies who couldn’t afford the required coronation robe and coronet – costing £1,250 – were allowed to wear a cheaper, simpler robe with a basic cap. 

But it was designed by Norman Hartnell.

Donald Trump’s uncouth claim that the late Princess of Wales ‘kissed his ass’ is robustly rebutted by Selina Scott. 

The late Princess Diana struggled with the attentions of Donald Trump, and did not ‘kiss his ass’, Selina Scott says (file image)

Princess Diana said the now former President of the U.S. gave her ‘the creeps’ when he sent her bouquets of flowers 

She recalls Diana being ‘bombarded with massive bouquets of flowers’ from Donald at Kensington Palace, adding: ‘Trump clearly saw Diana as the ultimate trophy wife. 

‘As the roses and orchids piled up at her apartment she became increasingly concerned… it had begun to feel as if Trump was stalking her.’ 

Selina remembers Diana remarking: ‘What am I going to do? He gives me the creeps.’ 

Scott advised: ‘Throw the flowers in the bin.’

Sir Michael Caine remains haunted by the ‘Not many people know that’ catchphrase attributed to him. 

Sir Michael Caine, pictured at his 90th birthday party with Tom Cruise, says he never said a catch phrase often attributed to him 

‘Peter Sellers said it when he impersonated my voice on his telephone answering machine,’ wails Caine, 90 this week. 

‘I don’t mind something clever being attributed to me, but I do mind something stupid that I did not say!’ 

Do a lot of people know that Michael?

Apropos of former royal chef Graham Newbould’s preparing fish and chips for the late Queen: He also had to cook for the royal pets, preparing chopped-up boiled lamb’s liver or rabbit with rice and cabbage for the beloved corgis. 

‘The gun dogs,’ he remembered, ‘had to make do with tripe.’

Gary Lineker’s agent Jon Holmes recalls that as a Leeds student Labour activist he queried Irish football manager Jack Charlton’s public support for the Conservatives after the local Conservatives claimed he had signed up for them. 

‘I only joined them for the fishing,’ explained keen angler Jack. Happy St Patrick’s Day.

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